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The Monster Inside Me



There is a monster inside me

It rarely comes out

But when it comes

out of anger 

I disappear

it is not me

I am not there

He is so ugly and irrational


I never know what is going to happen

But is never good

He is violent

I always push him inside

I don not let him manifest

So sometimes he forces his way out

I know he wants to stop my suffering

Because I am not very good dealing with people

But I hate his ways

He is so raw

And he never tells me what he is going to do

It is scary


I wish I could suffocate him inside me

like I do with my feelings